YOU CAN LEAD A HORSE TO WATER

I think we probably all know the old adage, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink."  We not only all know the saying, but we more than likely have experienced what it feels like to be standing at the edge of the water, willing the horse to drink, asking the horse to drink, and it simply is not interested in water at that moment in time. It can be very frustrating to be in either position.

If the horse is not thirsty and it is being cajoled and maybe even pushed into the water, it can stand its ground and simply refuse to drink. And the one who has led the horse to the water, because he/she believes the horse needs to drink, can only stand there and eventually give up. 

In every day life, we may often take people by the hand and bring them to the water, because we have such a longing for them to drink what we believe is needed. Maybe, it is needed by the individual, but they may have no knowledge or desire for that water.

What do we do? Do we 1) not take them to the water, 2) force the water into their mouth and hold their nose until they swallow, 3) get angry with them because they refuse what we so willingly offer or 4) respect their decision to not drink?

The simple truth is we cannot make others partake of what we think is good for them or what they need. Basically, we really do not know what others need. We can guess, we can hypothesize, we can pontificate, but in the end, unless we can see into someone's inner being, we do not know what they need.

I wish I had a dollar for every time some well meaning person attempted to enlighten me as to what I needed. Sometimes I didn't even know what I needed. It is not easy to always know what we need, and when we do know, it is a blessing.

So, what do we do when we have those in our life who seem to be floundering?  How do we reach them and get them to drink the crystal clear water we have to offer them? Perhaps the answer is to not try to make them drink. Instead, to meet them where they are in love and kindness. I believe we can encourage others to get help, to make a change, to take a positive step forward by introducing them to the water, without making them feel wrong for not wanting a drink. 

It is tough because most of us want people to be who we think they should be. We want them to believe what we think they need to believe. Unfortunately, in our desire to change others, we run the risk of ruining the relationship. It is easier for all, if we can give up our need to change others and instead, let them walk their path.

Looking back on my life, I can see how much easier life would have been if I had listened to others and followed the path they wanted me to follow. However, being the rebel I was, I did not bend to others beliefs about what they thought I needed. I probably would have saved myself a lot of heartache and stress and strife, but you know what? The day came, and continues to come, when I saw the water and knew I needed to drink. My path in life eventually led me to my healing path and I put my foot on this path, not because someone told me I needed to, or force fed me clean water, but because I was ready to do this. 

I still believe the teacher appears when the student is ready, and if the teacher shows up early, the student may not learn the lesson in front of them. We each have a path in life, and we are each charged with finding and walking that path. 

For a long time I believed unless someone was on a soul healing journey, they had not found their path. However, I am coming to understand that since our paths differ, perhaps everyone is not here to walk a healing path, or perhaps I am wrong to assign meaning to what a healing path looks like. Because your path does not look like mine, does not necessarily mean you are not on a healing journey. 

I think it comes down to trusting the benevolent creator energy that is swirling around us and in us, to bring us to where we need to be. So, next time you bring a horse to water and it refuses to drink, let it be and love  it where it is.